It’s human nature to want. We want success, nice things, health, experiences, connection, and more. Ambition, curiosity, and longing are some of our greatest strengths. Left unexamined, though, they can attach to whatever is loudest or easiest. Much of what we chase was handed to us by culture, comparison, or other people’s expectations. Part of chasing goodness is developing an understanding of what we seek and why. Wanting something because others have it is very different from wanting it because it reflects who we are.
Most pursuits stand in for something deeper. The promotion may really be about respect, the scrolling about rest, the purchase about security. Surface wants are often clumsy messengers for real needs. When we name the true need, we can usually meet it more directly than any substitute could.
Leaders recognize that some pursuits deplete us and some build us up. Low-level wants aren’t something we need to reject altogether. The key is to take them in small portions, knowing they’re snacks, not meals. A good life has room for indulgence and entertainment. Trouble begins only when snacks crowd out nourishment, and we wonder why we still feel hungry.
Goodness is often found in longer journeys that satisfy us in different ways. The most durable goods, such as health, peace, accomplishment, and contribution, usually benefit others too. A useful test of any pursuit is whether it makes us better to be around. Goods that enrich only us tend to fade quickly. Goods that ripple outward tend to compound.
Strength also comes from recognizing the journey is part of the good. Resist treating the pursuit as a cost to pay to reach the prize. Instead, realize that much of the good life is found in the effort itself: the growth, the learning, the people we meet along the way. If we can’t find any good in the chase, it’s worth asking whether the destination will satisfy us either.
Here are practical ways to aim our efforts toward chasing goodness:
- Ask “And then what?” Before chasing something, ask what you hope it will give you, and keep asking until you hit the core desire. Then ask whether there’s a better path to it.
- Run an after-feeling check. Judge pursuits by how you feel an hour, a day, or a week later, not in the moment. Goodness tends to leave you restored. Less worthy pursuits leave you depleted.
- Define your own “good” in four or five words. Leaders can name the outcomes that matter to them, such as health, peace, growth, service, or connection. Use that list as a filter for calendar, spending, and attention decisions.
- Ration the rest on purpose. For things that aren’t wholly valuable, decide your limits in advance rather than in the moment. Enjoy them fully, just don’t let them become your focus.
- Pursue something beyond yourself every day. Do one act of mentoring, service, or contribution daily. Joy and contentment are often byproducts of doing good for others.
Founded in 2004, Lead Star is the company behind the best-selling books SPARK, Leading from the Front, and Bet on You. Lead Star helps professionals reach new levels of success through its innovative leadership development programs.
