We’re two weeks into the new year—by now, statistically speaking, you may have already forgotten your BHAGs (Big Hairy Audacious Goals) or resolutions. All jokes aside, I hope that’s not the case!
As 2024 ended, I had many conversations about goal setting and plans for 2025. People often ask me, “What are your new year goals? Did you make any resolutions?” These questions are well-meaning—they get the conversation going—but they made me consider how much more engaging conversations could be with a small shift.
This idea struck a chord with me during an episode of The Diary of a CEO podcast, where host Steven Bartlett and his guest explored how we connect with others in personal and professional settings. They highlighted the impact of the questions we ask. Think about the last time you struck up a casual conversation at a dinner party or networking event. How often do we default to asking, “What do you do for a living?” It’s a familiar question, but it often feels surface-level and limiting.
Instead, what if we asked something more engaging? For example, “What projects are you passionate about right now?” or “What’s been inspiring you lately?” These reframed questions invite people to share more about themselves in a way that feels genuine and judgment-free. They also reflect a deeper curiosity, opening the door to discovering what truly drives and excites them.
This principle translates seamlessly into leadership. The questions we ask as leaders shape the quality of our connections and the trust we build with our teams. Below are examples of common questions leaders might ask, paired with alternatives that encourage richer, more meaningful conversations:
Common Question: “How’s work going?”
Alternative: “What’s been the most rewarding part of your work lately?”
Common Question: “Do you have everything you need to finish this project?”
Alternative: “What challenges are you facing, and how can I support you in overcoming them?”
Common Question: “What’s your goal for this quarter?”
Alternative: “What’s a big win you’re working toward, and what excites you most about it?”
Common Question: “Are you on track to meet the deadline?”
Alternative: “What’s helped you stay on track, and is there anything we can adjust to make it smoother?”
These small shifts in how we frame our questions can lead to richer conversations and stronger connections. When you’re genuinely curious, people feel valued, and you gain insights that help you lead more effectively.
